ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS

            Let’s talk about abusive relationships today. Relationships are part of our lives. We are always in a relationship, whether between parents and their children, between siblings, relatives, between friends, or between lovers.

            What do I mean by abusive relationship? A relationship where coercive, physical or control behaviour is used against a partner(s) is abusive. Abuse could either be verbal or physical. Of course, none of the choice is right because they do damages to our physical and mental health.

           Verbal abuse in a relationship involves using strong words and insults to break another person’s will, thereby destroying their self-esteem and self-worth. Saying hurtful words deliberately in a destructive manner is verbal abuse. This sort of abuse is common between parents and children relationships. Correcting somebody should be done in love and in a constructive manner, to have desired results. Destructive criticisms have grievous consequences on a person. Such abused persons tend to be timid, quiet, have low self-esteem and afraid of trying new things in fear of being criticised.

         Physical abuse involves the use of fists to cause bodily harm to a person. Physical abuse is mostly found between lovers and couples, and in rear cases, children and parents. I will be laying more emphasis on physical abuse between couples and lovers. Physical abuse is damaging, not only to the body, but also mentally. Most victims have depression, low self-esteem, suicide ideas and become a shadow of them, and most cases result in death.

         Physical violence is used to gain and maintain total control over you. Abusers use fear, shame, guilt and intimidation to wear you down and keep you under their thumbs. Has he hit you? Does he use guilt to hold you down? Or shame? Come out of it now!

         He will always tell you "its your fault that I hit you". Weighing you down with guilt and making you think that you are crazy. He will make you think you are a weird creature.

         Never stay in an abusive relationship. Talk to somebody about it. Seek help while you still can. Don’t listen to the lies he will tell you. He will never change. He will continue to hit you and break you down. You don’t have to die in silence.

Please seek help today!

 

Humbly submitted,

Monisola Tairu